An update, i suppose.

I’m not writing much lately. Comes from Hubby finding it. I knew – and he knew – that would happen.

Nothing is going on really to talk about though. No hook ups, no “good” things to talk of.

 Connecticut is just that… in Connecticut. We txt msg eachother a few times a week and I might get a reply from an email but for the most part thats all. I got him worked up enough last week to call me so I could hear him cum for me on the telephone though. I love that.

 And Down Under… well again, that’s where he is… down under. We still pong Sunday – Thursday night’s if there isn’t anything unusual going on, and i talked with him on the phone twice (i think) this week, but that’s all. He’s got company over this weekend. I had thanksgiving. It’s all good. I miss him. I miss them both.

Still… i’m such an ass. I want to hook up with a lot of people, but i never do. And the ones that i wouldn’t hesitate to hook up wiht live (probably thankfully) too far away. Hubby is still jealous of Connecticut… but surprised me last week by saying he didn’t mind Down Under too much… Maybe its because he lives so far away it’s already tomorrow afternoon there… The likeliness of him ever being here is so slim that Hubby can like him without worries. Who knows. I feel better talking to him if hubby likes him.

 I miss down under today though. And Connecticut, but it’s different.
I found lots of old emails from Connecticut recently.
He used to talk to me. Tell me things. Explain things. They didn’t used to be like they are now.
How he barely talks to me about anything and when he does it’s sexual… And when it’s not sexual between US, its something sexual about him and his girl and i HATE that. OH MY GOD. I do NOT want to know that you are fucking her unless you tell me that you’re thinking about ME when you’re doing it. I’d LOVE knowing that. In fact, i’m going to email him right now….

You’ve gotta answer… truthfully.

Ever think of me during?
When you’re fucking your girl
and she wants you to be rough…

do you think about the things that we’ve talked about?
Do you do those things and think of me?

There… I’ll keep you informed what the answer is.

Goodnight.

just at work
no trouble
gonna plan for a romantic evening for the girl to destress her

she is really into the roughness.
she tells me i am not rough enuff or aggresive enuff for her
so i guess i gotta work on that.

basically all that stuff that you love and want from me is what she wants me to be with her.
so i gotta work on not worrying about hurting her i guess.

—————– Original Message —————–
From: ME
Date: Nov 6, 2007 12:43 PM

What are you up to today?
Causing trouble, i hope.

Who the fuck does he think he is. What a bastard!

I don’t even know anymore.

I flirt. That’s who I am. There are so many that i flirt with. But am I too forward. Do i flirt too much? I get offended easily by the comments made by those I flirt with. Most recently by the person from the party. He started it. I didn’t ask for him to go down on me.. that was all him. But now when i flirt with him, its all weird? 2 nights ago at a party I flirted… i wouldn’t say I was out of control or anything but yeah, i flirted. He mentioned to hubby something like “yeah, i made out with her once” Which makes us believe that he doesn’t remember or he didn’t want to say in front of Steve what he did remember. You know what… nevermind. I’m over boys. I’ll keep the one i have.

 I don’t feel that down under and I aren’t real close anymore. He likes a girl. She’s apparently broken his heart though. I’m not able to fix it for him. Not sure how much he wants me to try. I’m sad when i think about him. 

 Connecticut and I are… well, we are. The New Guy – he says one thing and does another. But he’s a great maker-outer. There’s a newer kid…. he’s young. I think it’d be fun to teach him a thing or two, but i never would. I’d scare him.

 Home – i’m staying home.